Sibling Grief Support

Dr. Mac’s parents were high school sweethearts. However, they separated when she was 9 and were officially divorced by the time she turned 11. This had a traumatizing impact on her, not because the divorce was filled with drama. It was not. But because she never saw her parents fuss, fight or argue. This was completely “out of the blue” for her and she began to internalize the loss of this parent and the nuclear family as she knew it. During this time, her brother, 4 years her senior, and she, who were already incredibly close, became more so. He was her big brother, her friend, and at times filled in as a father. She was his little sister, a friend that he probably shared more than his friends know with, and at times she was a second mother. So much so that their mother started calling her “Little Mommy.” However, on the Sunday before her first day of 11th grade, her brother passed away. What stands out the most for Dr. Mac from this time, were the number of people who kept telling her that she needed to be strong for her mother. Her mother’s loss was devastating! So was Dr. Mac’s. She lost such a huge and incredible part of her life, yet no one seemed to notice that she could, would, or should experience grief as well.